“I’m making more money than ever, but I still feel broke…” Sound familiar? It’s time for a money transformation.
Many new clients come to me after receiving a raise or promotion yet still living paycheck-to-paycheck. That was the case for Tavianna, who came to me after a massive raise but still unsure of where all her money was going. Tavianna is going to give you a peek into what it’s like working with me in a five-month coaching partnership. She’s already achieved so much in the two months we’ve been together so far!
In this episode, Tavianna and I are chatting about her financial journey so far. She’s opening up about the mindset blocks that nearly prevented her from asking for help and what inspired her to make the leap. If you asked Tavianna today, she wouldn’t tell you she feels broke. Like she says in this episode, she’s finally spending and saving her money with intention.
In this episode, you’ll learn…
- What inspired Tavianna to reach out and take the first step to transform her money story [2:40]
- How spending out of alignment with your values leads to financial instability [4:37]
- How Tavianna pushed past her mindset blocks and invested in coaching [6:15]
- Why financial confidence is vital in making progress on your money journey [10:22]
- What improvements Tavianna made to her financial systems in our first 30 days together [15:14]
- How value-based budgeting allows you to spend in alignment with what matters most to you [22:12]
- How to use your extra paycheck if you’re on a 26-paycheck cycle [24:16]
- How to navigate money conversations with your partner [27:44]
- How your financial health creates a “domino effect” in the other areas of your life [31:25]
- How Tavianna learned to trust the process and take her time allocating her funds [39:14]
If you’re ready to gain clarity and improve your own financial future, tune in for this week’s episode.
Want to see results like Tavianna’s? Apply to work with me and take the first step towards your bright financial future.
Want to see another money transformation? Hear how Jeanine got out of the debt cycle in five short months!
Keina Newell [00:00:00] Hi and welcome to Money Files, I’m Keina Newell from Wealth Over Now. I work every day with professional women and solopreneurs to help them get out of financial overwhelm and shame so they can experience more flexibility and ease with their finances. Are you ready to gain confidence and learn to manage your finances intentionally? Tune in and grab financial tips that will help you master the way you think about and manage your finances.
Keina Newell [00:00:33] Hi, welcome to another episode of Money Files. Today, I’m being joined by my client, Tavianna. I actually haven’t finished the five month partnership, but I thought it would be really fun to have a conversation with her because we are about a month into the five month coaching partnership. And I know that when people say yes to coaching, there are so many thoughts that come along with that. But I hold the space of holding trust for you and being able to shift your relationship with money. And I know that if you can find that trust within yourself, that everything can shift for you in relation to your finances. So earlier this week, I asked Tavianna, I said, Hey, would you mind hopping on a call with me and recording a podcast so other people can hear about it? What does it actually look like to work with a coach? And really, from the perspective of someone who is actually in the work and in the midst of the transformation? So now you want to introduce yourself?
Tavianna [00:01:32] Sure thing. Hey, everyone, my name is Tatiana. I think Keina and I have been working together for two months.
Keina Newell [00:01:39] It’s about, you know, forty five days time.
Tavianna [00:01:43] Yeah. So I had heard from a friend that Keina was like, I refer to my friends as my financial guru, coach, therapist person. So I heard from another friend just about the positive work that he had done with her, and I hemmed and hawed about it. I was like, Oh, I can’t do this. I’m not really sure that this is for me right now and made every excuse in the book until I had a consultation conversation with Tina. And you know, it’s history here. I am so excited to check there.
Keina Newell [00:02:16] Tell us, and let’s be clear on the friend, because the friend will listen to this conversation. Brent. Yes.
Tavianna [00:02:21] Yes.
Keina Newell [00:02:22] And if you have it, listen to Brent’s money story, you should definitely go back and listen. I want to say it’s episode 19 from season one, so you should definitely listen to his story, and I thank him for introducing you to me, which he told me about you all along the time we were working together. He’s like, And she’s a delta. Okay, good people. So but yeah, so just tell us like where? What made you reach out? Because even booking a call and saying, like, Yep, I’m willing to talk to Tina and I want to apply to work with you. What? What prompted you to do that?
Tavianna [00:02:53] So at twenty twenty one, let me start by thanking my background in terms of professional background in higher education. And so folks that work in higher education know that the experience is very much like you’re there for a passion because you care about helping the youths be better youths, and that’s, that’s the way that you kind of think about it. It is very much a fulfilling role, but it is also an area where you’re truly overworked and underpaid. And so I was like, I think I could be making more. I think I could be not living paycheck to paycheck, and I could just do something different if I shift my career. So I got a new job at the beginning of the year where I got about a $30,000 raise and of course, was like, Oh, OK, I’m ballin’. Things are great, I’m rich, I’ve made it. I can do what I want and I should be living comfortably and half way. Maybe the first, like three to four months. I could not tell you, like, have this money. I have no idea where it’s going. No clue where the money’s going. Couldn’t tell you where the additional income went. Didn’t see any bigger numbers on my savings account or paying off debt. And so also in that time frame, a couple of months into having a new job, my bank account went negative for the first time since my grad school and I was like, You are out of control. You need help. Something you’re doing is not working. The strategy that I had before clearly was no longer working, and so that really just catapulted me into reaching out and knowing that I needed the help and I couldn’t do it on my own. So it was like a negative bank account and a whole host of other things in terms of me feeling out of whack with my ability to maintain my finances.
Keina Newell [00:04:37] Do you remember, like what were your feelings on the consultation as we kind of talked about what were some of your biggest struggles and what did you want to achieve financially for yourself?
Tavianna [00:04:47] Yeah, I think it was kind. It was eye opening because I think it was that conversation where you were kind of like hinting or kind of foreshadowing this idea of aligning your finances or your choices with what you value. And so for me, during that initial conversation, I was like, Oh my gosh, I’ve just been frivolously spending money, or I’ve just been making these financial choices that don’t really align with the things that I care about or the things I’m saying. I want to have this goal to buy a house pool, then why am I not consistently putting money towards my house? Like what? So it was, I don’t know. I’m sure somebody would like it because of the barbell. You’re a perfectionist for whatever reason. Perfection, if he came out, so let’s blame it on my side, but I was like, Oh my gosh, I could be doing so much better and I’m doing a terrible job at this, so I felt a personal sense of shame. Not from you at all, but because I had, like you helped me realize that I was not doing what I said I like. I wasn’t aligning with what I said I wanted or cared about in terms of how I was spending so close to it was a hard pill to swallow. And then when we started to talk about the commitment and the cost, I was like, Oh, OK, well, I can’t do this now, so I can’t afford this coaching. So thank you for the call. But no, it’s not going to work, but then I have started the process of talking myself out of the help that I very much knew I needed.
Keina Newell [00:06:15] About that because that was also the thing we talked about earlier this week because we came up in your first session checking like, I can’t believe I just dropped this lump sum of money and decided to work with you. Yeah. Like, I’m not sure if I made a good decision, dot dot dot.
Tavianna [00:06:31] Yeah, because I, I think to myself, it was difficult to see this money come out of my account all at once and in my head, I had set that money aside for a house. So it was like, Oh gosh, you just, you know, you spent all this time saving this money. You finally got to the goal that you were hoping for, and now you just gave half of it away for something that has no life, truly nothing to do with you buying a house. That’s the way I looked at it at first, but I was like. And as we’ve continued in the conversations, I’ve realized the lack of a piece about the choices because I know that I was never going to be able to successfully buy a house and maintain the bills and the maintenance. And this and that and the third, or buy furniture and do what I needed to do without this investment. First, I had to learn how to better manage the money that I do have so that I could successfully be in the next step of life. Like do the things that I want to do comfortably without the stress of, Oh my God, is my account going to go negative? So that was a long way of saying. I think at first it was hard because it was the most money that I ever spent at one time. And then the other thing is, when you don’t know someone, well, like I had heard about you from Brant and I’m Brant, I was on your Instagram page. I was looking at all the stories trying to go to the Better Business Bureau to see what was going on, but I wanted to. I wanted to make sure, you know, we’re living in the age of scamming. So I was like, What if I just gave all this money in this girl’s life to run off what my bucket plan was? And I know that’s unrealistic and crazy, but –
Keina Newell [00:08:10] It’s not crazy. But yes.
Tavianna [00:08:14] Actually googled Keina. What does Keina do? How does Keina have reviews? It was ridiculous, but anyway, that old tweet that also helped me fuel settled in and I was comfortable and excited about my decision because I knew that you were someone that could be trusted. I knew that this experience was going to be worthwhile. I had heard the reviews, I’ve read the reviews, and so that helped as well.
Keina Newell [00:08:36] But what? I guess, what was it about me? So this came from I asked people on Instagram and on my Facebook group. I like what questions they would want to know from someone who’s worked with me in that first month and somebody asked, Why did you choose to work with Keana specifically?
Tavianna [00:08:52] Yes, I have a financial adviser, right? Someone I know from college was helping me get my retirement and rocks and things together, and I appreciate his knowledge of money and I appreciate the way that he helps me prepare for my future. The difference between that and the work that I’ve been doing with you is it’s not just about like, let’s get this money in these accounts, it’s about, Let’s think of you the way you are in your first consultation conversation, the way you explained it is. We’re going to think about your behaviors around money, and how you feel when you are spending. We’re going to dive into what your habits are. Where are you making more money? Great. Where is it going? And so I think that was just at a different level of intentionality. And I think there was also a different level of care. You’re a black woman that was really important to me. You’re a soarer, too. So that also, you know, played a part. But I think to me, it was very much about, I’ve done the envelope things before on my own. I’ve done the, you know, I love the Peak app and stashed away dollars. But what I was missing was the focus on intentionality and alignment with what matters. And so that you very clearly spoke about that from the beginning and all of your posts and our initial conversations. So I think what I needed to do was really important in terms of pushing me to say, yes, I want to do this work with you.
Keina Newell [00:10:15] I love that. I feel like I have a million questions now, probably none of which are the ones that I shared with you.
Tavianna [00:10:20] That’s OK.
Keina Newell [00:10:22] Which I enjoy, like, I just enjoy having these candid conversations because I’ve underscored this before that I appreciate clients who are willing to have these conversations with me. One because it gives you an opportunity to celebrate what you’re doing. But then for people listening, it’s also like, Oh, that person’s like me. And I would say that I don’t think if I had asked Tavianna in the very beginning, Hey, will you have this conversation with me about your finances that she would have said yes. And that speaks to what’s already started to happen internally in terms of what your thoughts are about the things that you’ve accomplished in the past versus the things that you see yourself being able to accomplish from this point forward when you think about managing your finances. So just want to want to say that you’re nodding your head,
Tavianna [00:11:09] You got some degree. I mean, I agree. I think about my upbringing, my family. And so there was certainly a lot of shame around not having enough money. And with that, not ever wanting to talk about it because it was like I felt like I’d be judged or, you know, like people was like, Oh, how to make it work with that little or whatever. And so just to avoid all of your voice people being in my business, but also to avoid being asked difficult questions. That was just not a conversation I had. Now I think it’s because I feel more confident in myself. That’s the second piece. The second piece is also not feeling confident in the way that I was managing my own money. And so again, it goes back to some of the shame and the like not really feeling good. Even though I had a system and air quotes, I clearly wasn’t doing something. Something that I was doing was not working. And so that also made it very difficult to have conversations about my finances or finances in general. Now that I am even in these first 45 days, now that I have a better understanding of my own finances, I can broach those like I can engage in those conversations with more comfort and more confidence because I can tell you where every dollar is going or coming from or coming from or going. I can also be clear about things like, what are my goals around my finances? I could not do that 40 days ago. You could say, Oh, I want a house and there is no other well. How much is the house cost and what does it take to buy a house? And what are the other fees? I hadn’t thought through that until recently, so that was a ramble. But you get it out, tell us.
Keina Newell [00:12:53] So you said you had a system in air quotes, so tell us about the system and then tell us about the first thirty forty five or not to the T. We don’t know the exact number, but tell us about what coaching you’ve experienced in that first month and a half.
Tavianna [00:13:09] Yeah. OK, so the system, I should have brought my book up here so you could laugh, but the folks won’t be able to see it anyway. I had this every, I think for the past seven or eight years since I had enough money to budget, I would get a book and I would write down all of my bills. And it’s funny because my system, I think, was very much like what I’m doing with you. It just was poorly executed, so I would sometimes grab a little glass of wine, sometimes two glasses of wine, and my handwriting would get a little crazy. I would write a number down for how much I thought was supposed to be spent on something, but then I could read it. So I would just take whatever the check was going to be for that week, and I would say, OK, I know your card. I can’t do the split half of that. Take half from this paycheck. I deduct that from the overall amount, my rent, half of that, I did that from the overall amount. And as you can see, it sounds chaotic because it is and I really believed I was like, Okay, I know exactly what I’m doing here. So anyway, my process was really like taking the big number for the check that I was going to get paid a week or so in advance. I would sit down with the book and I’d write down all the bills that had to come out of that check. I’d like planning for long term things if I had a trip like, OK, let me put $50 towards my trip fund from this check. But it was pretty much like a week or two every two weeks of going through this process. It wasn’t really useful because as I was spending, I wasn’t deducting and changing the amount and updating in real time. So I would have had a weekend of being out and socializing and having a good time. And then I get home and Monday try to look at my book to see what I have left for the week. And I’m like, Oh gosh, I got pending charges or things that I am budget for. I overspend at Trader Joe’s. I had one too many appetizers at the Restaurant. Whatever the case might have been, so the system failed. It stopped working and it was not useful. The second part of your question was, I forgot, sorry.
Keina Newell [00:15:14] I was saying the first like, so that’s how that’s your system that you have in air quotes and what has what has coaching looked like for you in the first 30 days?
Tavianna [00:15:25] Oh yes. So it has looked like, I think, my most memorable exercise that I’ve done so far is really tracking all of my spending. So tracking my spending, but not just what was spent, but also how I felt when I spent it truly gave me a better view of my finances instead of budgeting like, Oh, I know my cell phone bill is like one hundred thirty two dollars. Now, what exactly is it? How much does it cost every month? What did you say to me the other day? Like on the street, you might step over a penny, but at this moment, every penny counts. Yeah, so that’s not the case for me in the past. In the past, I was like, No, it doesn’t matter. Let’s just give round numbers, but really tracking what I was spending, tracking how I felt about said spending and then being able to look at the end of the first couple of weeks and say, like, OK, wow, this is a purchase that you didn’t feel good about. Why is that? Do you need to keep making that purchase? Oh, this was stress induced spending. You bought something from Amazon. You don’t even know where it is. You have a track that you didn’t really need. So I think that was super valuable for me. Also writing out all of my bills like all my bills, all my expenses. And so something that I had never liked, never thought about ever was why not prepare for those yearly bills, those annual bills in advance, like I know I’m going to pay for my Amazon membership every year in November? Why am I waiting until October to prepare for that? So be like, OK, now I got the $75 or whatever. So I think the first 30 days have been enlightening about my own habits, but also eye opening in terms of like what I know I’m capable of when I pay attention and I am intentional and I think about, I guess really, it’s just it’s helped me to see that I can I can do the work. I just have to spend the time doing it and that’s what I was not doing before.
Keina Newell [00:17:31] What would you say in terms of thinking about shifts and thinking, like, how did you view money before we started working together, which I think you alluded to even saving for an annual expense like you have an Amazon membership, right? That’s something you have. So we could save. It’s not a hundred and twenty dollars. It’s actually like one hundred and twenty six and probably 14 cents, if I’m correct, may be off by a couple of pennies, but you could divide that by 12 and save for it every month. So then I mean, if that’s something that’s automatically charged to your credit card, if you don’t feel the impact of it because it’s been within your line of sight, right? Correct. If you think about how you view money now versus when we first started?
Tavianna [00:18:15] Yeah. So I don’t know if this would make sense. Initially, when we first started, I would say I used money in two ways. One, as like a big, scary monster that I never really felt like I could understand or like, have a grip on. And like, imagine like a monster under the bed constantly trying to grab your ankles. You know, you’re just like jumping away from it, you know, spare me. So I really like something that feels so big, so hairy. So something I could not comprehend that it was a challenge. But also on the flip side, like monopoly money where I was like, OK, cool, I’m going to swipe this car. And if there’s a will, there’s a way or whatever. Like, I felt like it was not because I didn’t have a plan. I was kind of just hoping and praying that my account would go negative. And so while it was scary, I also just like, I do what I do and pray for the best. And so it was kind of not a real thing for me until I started to pay attention to it, right? I don’t know if that makes sense. I hope it does.
Keina Newell [00:19:20] Like, I think it does make sense because even just thinking about going back to you and you were tracking your finances, I remember in one of our coaching conversations, I think you went to homecoming name, right? And you were reflecting back to me like, you know, sometimes I like to go out with my friends and I might say, I’m going to buy a round of drinks or whatever. And so I realize now like, that’s one of my tendencies, and it’s also something that I value, right? Like, I want to be in a place to be able to do this for other people. But I think now, just even within a couple of weeks, it’s not to say that you are like, No, I can’t do that anymore. But now I think you’re willing to look at like, how do I incorporate this into how I desire to spend my money? We allotted giving to others and charity as a result of that conversation, then this past week, we were talking that one of your friends wanted a donation and you had also you told me something else about like, I want to take something, we removed something that you had A. I can’t remember what it was and then I was like, Hey, you know, we have this money and given to others. You got like a hundred dollars there, right? But it’s just being able to know that when I do decide to lean into something that is innately me and innately who I am, I’m going to have prepared for it in some way because I’ve been intentional. So I think in speaking about your like scary monster, like things don’t have to be scary now. It’s like, Oh, I did buy an extra appetizer, whatever that is like, I don’t care if all the appetizers you want, but now you’re going to know here, I’m going to know where those shifts came from versus like just throwing darts and praying and hoping for the best.
Tavianna [00:21:14] Correct? Yes, that’s it. What you were talking about was my friends from Eighth Grade, who is a really good musician who wanted me to buy his mixtape. And I was like, OK, that’s thirty three dollars. Can I buy this mixtape? Do I like this mixtape? Do I care? And then I was able to think about, like, OK, I want to support my friend and his career and, you know, show him that I value you the efforts he’s put in for it. So sure, I can purchase this mixtape because we set aside money for, you know, to give to others. And so or for songs that say it’s cherry, it’s not charity, but like to be able to support people and in the ways in which I like to. But before I was like, I’m just going to, I’m going to pay for it and figure it out. Now I’m like, No, I’m going to pay for it because I know I’ve set money aside and then it’s not going to put me in a bind later. I’m not going to have to pull from my grocery money later because of it.
Keina Newell [00:22:12] So yeah, I think we’ve been able to prioritize. Like, right now we’re recording this conversation and we are in the midst of Christmas. I know your mom is coming and we talked about like, what does that generally look like? And I know a lot of people can relate to this. When people come to town, it’s like, Dang, my grocery bill went up, right? And so we were able to proactively talk about what does that generally look like? Let’s look at your finances. Where potentially do we want to say not right now? Or where do we want to lean in or pull back? Also, I should name the TV show that is getting married. So there’s just a lot of like we started this work where there’s a lot of different things moving financially. But I would say that it’s allowed you to put a lot of things in perspective and be able to kind of prioritize and our priorities one week may look different. In the next week, you’re like, Wait, let’s revisit those priorities. So being able to actually manipulate and ground in true numbers, right?
Tavianna [00:23:11] And where would my old system have been? Maybe I would go back to my notebook and try to cross something out and rewrite the whole list. But then I’ve missed the bill because I’m like, human error. Now I’m like, OK, I have this spreadsheet. I know that if I want to update something, I probably can’t say this, but I’m constantly like, I’mma make a copy of the one we’ve been using just in case I missed something. And then she’s like, We’re going to delete this duplicate because, you know, like. Anyway, my process truly is that you can’t fail. Essentially, it’s Microsoft Excel doing the math for me. I’m not going to miss anything I’m able to to make sure that everything transfers over appropriately and I can see it better so I can look and say, All right, we didn’t spend time here. So where can I reallocate this money? It’s valuable to have just like it’s clean, it’s clean. It’s helpful. It’s a lot of mess that I had. I guess I would explain that my previous financial life was messy or messy, and now I’ve removed the clutter and eliminated the mess. So that’s been very helpful.
Keina Newell [00:24:16] You are also in a three cycle Paycheck Month. I know a lot of people in the world. I get paid twenty six times versus twenty four times during the year. What’s the purpose of a third paycheck month?
Tavianna [00:24:29] Keina, had you asked me last or a month and a half of what I would have said if I had gone on vacation, but this third paycheck is truly to help me prepare for future months. And so that has also been eye opening to think about because before I would have been like, I’m just going to spend this money on whatever I want, things that the whole year I thought I couldn’t get because, you know, I wasn’t doing other things appropriately. I would have spent the money and had nothing to show for it. So now it’s like I can prepare for future bills and plan for the bag or the shoes or the treat that I want for myself. So that’s that’s also been like, like mind blowing. Like, why wasn’t I thinking like this before this? Makes perfect sense. Why had I not been preparing for my future this whole time? So anyway, yes.
Keina Newell [00:25:19] Yes. Yeah. If you decide that that third paycheck is not free money, it
Tavianna [00:25:24] It’s not free money.
Keina Newell [00:25:25] I can name for you why it’s not free money because you still gotta eat that week and the week after. There are certain things, and especially when you have a system, you can look at it objectively and really think about, Oh, there are some intentional shifts that we can actually use this money for instead of that. But whatever Donna and I we’ve been talking about, like, how do we get ahead? Making sure that she’s one paycheck cycle like in front of her bills, but also looking at like, are there any other savings goals that we’ve been talking about? And so we actually want to swing money from that like where we normally would save for? I was going to say lawn care, but you don’t have a lawn. But that’s the example that comes to mind. Like, maybe I don’t need to save for lawn care out of that third paycheck, and I could use one hundred dollars that I would generally put towards lawn care and put it in maybe my vacation time. But we’ve been able to strategically plan ahead, and it just so happens that her third paycheck is also coming at the most expensive time of the year. So we’ve been able to be really intentional about what’s coming up for Christmas. So what’s coming up for New Year’s? What are the things that inevitably are happening in your life? Because we’ve chosen to start this process, like not when everything was perfect, which by the way, there’s no perfect time. And so really just helping you think about what’s happening in the next 30, 60, 90 days because we have a tendency to say yes to things and say, we’ll figure it out later. So what do we want to figure out now so that we have that plan for later?
Tavianna [00:26:55] Absolutely sure. Like it is though the thing that I’ve struggled with forever and that even some members of my family still struggle with is like living paycheck to paycheck. Despite the fact that we feel like we’re doing the right things or putting money aside, we’re trying to like best of intentions, but like the ability to look at money as it’s a tool to help me to continue to live my life well and do the things that I want to do and not just feel like I got a little extra money to spend it. All right now, I want something to show for my dollars like I want. I want to be able to stay here. This aligns with the things that I care, care about and the people that I love. I have contingency for them, things that are natural, just all. All of it impacts your life and a whole bunch of ways. So why not get a handle on it?
Keina Newell [00:27:44] So shifting a little bit because we’ve also talked to I said that maybe I was getting married. How has this impacted money conversations in terms of your partnership?
Tavianna [00:27:55] Yeah, it has been different, partially because I come from a line of women who are independent and don’t need a man. So I have never seen these conversation models. And so I’ve been trying to figure out, how do I have open and honest conversations with my partner about what is known, like what our goals are, what’s our short term or long term? How do we want to combine our finances? Do we want to have separate pots? How do we want to do this? And so I’m kind of I think I asked you last week I was like, You know, can we make sure we talk about how I have this conversation, please? Because I’m not quite sure. And so we finally sat down, we talked through it, and it felt like relief that we could both be honest and open and we could be transparent with each other in that way. But also, we are both completely on the same page about what we want for our future. And so now to say like, OK, and I can work together to figure out how we get there and we have the tools to be able to do that is spectacular. It makes a big difference in terms of starting your married life as well.
Keina Newell [00:29:08] I’m excited for you because I’m like, Listen, girl, we’re going into this marriage with a firm financial foundation. Knowing finances are the things that catch people up, especially in relationships. And one of the things I always love to hear clients talk about is that they can actually have a money conversation with the person that they’re with, and it’s not a fight. And normalizing, though, we talk about money early and often, and it’s not because I don’t trust you or like, what are you doing with your money? Because it’s really about having this shared goal, we’ve created a shared set of goals. And so how do we actually work together and move forward?
Tavianna [00:29:43] Correct. And it’s very easy to be like, OK, we want to do this thing and that they want to vacation here. We want to buy this. But it’s a huge difference when you actually make it, like if you use the Smart Goals acronym, when you are specific about what you want to do, when it’s measurable, when you have a number to it and you have a deadline. And so that’s being having that level of clarity and knowing what’s going to help us. And these are all habits that are not going to stop after my partnership with. I’m going to be able to like movies, these will be the habits I have for the rest of my life, and so we’re always going to have many conversations. We’re always going to have our money dates, we’re always going to talk through. At this point, I’m sure he’d like to be on. I want to talk about money every single day. Yes, she does. So let’s just talk about what we’re trying to do. And 30, one day. So it’s been refreshing and it’s also been great to work with someone else to build our lives together. Financially strong are strong and successful and wealthy life. That’s what we’re hoping for. I’ve got to hope to grow. We’re going to get it. Yes. Yeah.
Keina Newell [00:30:55] So one of the things I ask you and the reason I wanted to have this conversation is you talked about making the investment in yourself. And I ask you, like, how do you feel about it now? You mentioned that Brant told you about how you rent basically a drink like Kool-Aid, Keina Kool-Aid or Keina Juice. I can’t remember what you referred to it as. But I was asking you, like, what shifts have you experienced in this first month that are more valuable than the investment you’ve made?
Tavianna [00:31:25] What shifts are more valuable lots, right? So when I think of, I think the most valuable asset has been paying attention. The little things that come out of your account, the little, you know, like charges eventually will add up in the same way that I spend sitting down with my account open and updating my notes. And I still have a little notebook, but it’s four different things now. It’s where I’m writing out my goals and truly visioning. I think the shift is the thoughtfulness behind it, whereas it was kind of arbitrary in the past, I was just doing what I thought works. And even though it wasn’t working, I wasn’t changing. I was still doing what I thought works, even though it wasn’t successful. Now I’m like, OK, I have. I have the ability to do this and do this well. I want to. I desire that. And so I’ve been devoting more time to it. I’ve been devoting more time to just making sure that everything I’m doing is in alignment with my values. And so it’s even gone beyond just financial peace. Well, actually, it doesn’t go beyond the financial piece of silicon that I’m thinking about. One of my first goals where I was like, I got an Orange Theory, but I’ve been missing classes and I know that physical health is important to me as well as financial health. And so I’m like Wolf, I’m spending all of this money on orange theory, but I’m not going to my classes. I don’t feel physically good. Then, like all of those things are interconnected, and so I need to start going back to austerity because I’m paying for it and I want to be healthy. And so, yeah, just I mean, the intentionality, the thoughtfulness behind my choices and I think being able to feel comfortable having these conversations have been the biggest shifts.
Keina Newell [00:33:10] And you talk about Orange Theory, I remember. I want to see in our first call, you were like part of your goals, which we put into Trello. So I go to OrangeTheory, clean out my closet and fix my spending plan, which someone listening might like. Those are not related at all, but they really are. When you like, there’s a domino effect. When I feel good in this area of my life, I get to address this other area of my life. And if I have mental clutter, then how does that show up in physical clutter and things of that nature?
Tavianna [00:33:38] Absolutely. That was one hundred percent. It was like my closet feels chaotic. I don’t even know what’s in there. I can feel the stress because I don’t like a messy space. And so I was feeling the physical strength of having an area that wasn’t clean. I was also feeling the physical stress of not going to this class and I signed up for and committed to. And then the financial stress, because if I signed up for one and I missed it, I would get a late charge. It was all a mess. But yes, I think the domino effect is the perfect way to explain it. And so having these conversations with you have helped me find clarity and a bunch of different areas in my life. I know so many of them relate to the financial pieces, but also like the physical pieces, the mental, the spiritual, emotional, all of that because it’s finally starting to come together for me. So thank you.
Keina Newell [00:34:27] Thank you. And I was going to say another piece on the clutter, right? Because one of my friends, she’s an organizer. And so even when you talk about clutter or your closet, and this may not relate specifically to you, but I can see it show up in my own life is how oftentimes do we buy something because our physical space is clutter or we put those nine volt battery somewhere, but we don’t remember where we put them. So we end up buying more batteries and then finding the ones because inevitably when you buy it, you find it and they appear, so thinking about how those relate. Or if you’re not going to the gym thinking about health, maybe you’re not making the health you’d like. Your choices aren’t as healthy in the kitchen, so you’re spending more on a DoorDash or. Uber and that’s and I’m not even talking about DoorDash or Uber like the money being bad, but it’s actually not on the alignment with where you are in terms of wanting to make sure that you’re taking care of your body and that you’re eating really well. And so that impacts your budget in the sense of I’m spending money in places that I don’t desire to spend money. I have all this, all these eating out charges. Plus, I got a high grocery bill because this was the week that I was going to quote unquote eat healthy. So now I have this day. I spent $200 at the grocery store and $150 at Uber Eats. And so it’s just when we talk about cleaning that all up, it allows you to pay attention to how one area of your life is affecting another area financially. But once again, I don’t think people realize that until you stop and pause and you’re like, Oh, hmm, that’s interesting.
Tavianna [00:36:05] That was one of my first moments. Early on, I did that exact thing. I was planning this big event. I was super stressed, but it was. It was the week of the event. And so I remember I had been because I was so overwhelmed and like not sleeping and just trying to do this thing really well. I had had these crazy headaches for a couple of days, so I went to the store and bought some Advil. And Advil is not cheap. You buy the 20 year or twenty four count, whatever it is, the X amount of dollars I get on the road to go to the event and realize I forgot the Advil. So then I had to buy Advil somewhere else. And again, not cheap. So now I’m mad at myself because I’m like, You have Advil at home. You just made this purchase. The only reason why you weren’t like it was because your life was out of whack. That’s why you forgot to pack it. And then I’m all in my feelings. And so it was a downward spiral. But we still rise. And so here we are. And so it’s just, you’re right, all of it is so interconnected and you have to find clarity and all those faces in order to feel well and whole and to do the things you want to do. So it took time to see that.
Keina Newell [00:37:17] I love it. So by the time this conversation airs, I’ll have released a solo podcast episode about financial self trust. I’m curious for you, like, where do you see trust playing a part or like self trust playing a part in this journey?
Tavianna [00:37:36] It’s very important for me to remain consistent in this. And so I I think I talk to you about this on my consulting call like I’d had a personal trainer for a little bit. And although I was going to work out, I wasn’t consistent in all the other areas. And so that was a part of why I didn’t know if I was ready to work with you because I’m like, What if I just spent all this money on a trainer and then see the results that I wanted to like a physical trainer and didn’t see those results? How am I going to spend even more with a financial coach and like, trust myself to do the work? And so for me, it has really been like, Oh no, we’re not playing games one because of the financial commitment, but because of the work that we’re doing. I know for me and my family can be like, it will be life changing, right? So it’s very much like I had to like, get the negative self-talk out of my head. And that personal training situation just didn’t work for me. That was there. And this is not that. And so I’ve been trying to remind myself like, you are good with money. I think you also sent some affirmation cards that I have found really valuable because it’s for me, the trust is about reminding myself consistently, You can do this, you’re capable. It’s going to be fine. You might struggle, but that’s OK because we’re going to get right back on track. And so it’s trusting myself to keep doing the work and trusting myself to know that it’s not always going to be perfect. But at the end of the day, we’ll be just fine. So, yeah,
Keina Newell [00:39:07] I love that and I’ll tell anybody you’re going to fail at budgeting. So now that we get that out the way? Yes. What’s the other problem?
Tavianna [00:39:14] Now that we’ve moved on? Because you said one day, don’t spend before you could like, try not to spend too much before you come back to our call. And I came back and I was like, Well I spent too much. So I’m sorry.
Keina Newell [00:39:25] You know, you know, we should talk about this because I think I think we’re over it. We’ll see. Tavianna, probably like three calls in. And she’s like, I just see these little things like visa payment, visa payment, visa payment. Fifty dollars, one hundred dollars. And I’m like Tavianna. I think we have like so far, we got like a hundred dollars set aside for your next visa payment, which isn’t due until this date. So can you explain to me what these visa payments are? That was in the first, the first time that we gave every dollar and then you come back and you more 50 forty five and it’s just like, Well, I have this money over and peak and I have this money in savings. You go and I’m like, No, you don’t have that money. We’ve already allocated that money. So you’re overworking your dollars. And you’re trying to correct in your head you’re dead. But I don’t need you to correct it. I just need you to trust me right now and we’ll get to paying off your debt. And Tatiana was looking at me like, I’m crazy. I think you told me you were triggered. And like, just please stop overworking your dollars and just trust me.
Tavianna [00:40:33] I am laughing so hard. I’m sweating TMI. But I’m so far away. It’s so funny. I would. Yeah, because my fear of my credit card bill being this or my the do, the amount do is going to be over x amount. And that’s too much. And that’s fearful and I don’t feel like I could pay that off. And so anytime I would swipe my card, I would be like, OK, I’m going to pay this off immediately. And so I don’t think I was still getting the hang of things with the tool that we use. And so I don’t think that it’s clear to me that all of the I know you were saying all the money had already been allocated, but I was seeing something different and I was like, Well, no, you don’t know about, I’m going to keep paying these bills or paying off this credit card. And it was just so silly. And now that I have a better grasp on what we’re doing and how we’re doing it, I think I know like, OK, yeah, you can, you can swipe and put something on that credit card, but you don’t have to pay it off at the moment after you swiped it. You can wait. Your bill is not due until this point. You’re allocating this amount like just again, it always goes back to being thoughtful and being intentional. And I think one time you would say I was stashing money away like a squirrel. Yeah. And I was stashing money away like a squirrel. And so I feel like I had that same sentiment as paying my bills, just throwing money at it and hoping the problem would go away.
Keina Newell [00:41:58] But the cash money also had like eight jobs. And what’s this money for? You’re like, Well, let me tell you if –
Tavianna [00:42:06] I am mortified. What was I doing?
Keina Newell [00:42:11] Anything new? It’s the whole world. Yeah, and it comes back. It just comes back to setting like those clear intentions. And we’ve been able to say, you did have this money in savings. Let’s actually if it was a thousand dollars, let’s say that three hundred of it was for this. Let’s say that two hundred was for this because I want you to clearly see it. So you’re not making decisions based on pure balance. Or as I like to call it, mental math, where when you go to add everything up, you like saying, Oh, I only have a thousand, but I allocated fifteen hundred. And so now we’re talking about a negative five hundred and there’s a lot of people out there that they are. They pay their credit card out of fear, they pay their credit card out of like, well, someone told me that I don’t need to have a credit card balance and that I need to always make sure I pay it off every single month. And so they will go to the extent of paying it off. But they haven’t considered how that impacts the bills that are coming up. And so if you’re listening to me, it’s not me saying I don’t want you to pay your credit card. I just want us to be able to see the big picture because in your ability to see the big picture, you’re going to know, Oh, OK, here’s what I’m doing, and I don’t care. I also am also not a coach. That’s like never use your credit card, right? Because you may be using your credit card for something. And I could tell you at the end of the week, make sure you pay seventy five dollars towards that. But once again, I want you to know exactly where it’s coming from. Not to be like a knee jerk reaction because of fear and overwhelm.
Tavianna [00:43:46] Yes. Absolutely. I’m grateful to not be paying my credit card off or putting money on it every forty five minutes I got you to buy that. Here’s some documents that, yes, life changing at all. All these are habits that take some time and muscle memory truly and building these good habits.
Keina Newell [00:44:06] And I always try to tell that to new clients. I’m like, Listen, I need you to understand any of this because it’s you building a new muscle. I just need you to trust me. Just rely on my trust right now because you may not be able to see it. I’ll explain it to you many different times, whether you know, auditory, visual kinesthetic, whatever we need to do to help you. I’m willing to make sure that you understand it because ultimately, at the end of the day, I want you to have that ownership of your numbers and to know that this is what I’m doing with my money. And here’s why. And for you to have adopted that clarity and confidence for yourself. So I only talk about your overworked dollars just because everybody has overworked dollars. Yeah. So they don’t get –
Tavianna [00:44:50] Those poor dollars were very overworked. They were exhausted.
Keina Newell [00:44:56] Oh yes. And we got rid of all of Tatiana’s money that she was squirreling away with these savings apps. And I don’t think anything’s wrong with the saving app, but most of the time I feel like people use them because they’re like, look, I’m magically saving. But we were able to be more intentional to say, Hey, how much do you want to spend on travel? How much do you want to spend on Christmas and not just Christmas, but the holidays? And let’s make that a consistent amount that we save. So whether it’s January or February or April, we’re saving the same amount so that when you get to November of 2022, you’re already set to cover the Friendsgiving, to cover the Christmas, to say like, Oh, you know, I’m buying white elephant presents, whatever that looks like, and you can confidently do that and and not have to worry about where that money is coming from.
Tavianna [00:45:47] Yeah, that’s a I would. You just made me think about if there was anything else that I’d add about the shift. It would be about knowing I had things coming up, but not really like kind of under budgeting for them. Like, I know me and my friends go out to eat probably once a month. I know that typically I would say, Oh, it’s going to be eighty dollars. And really, it would end up being closer to like one twenty, one thirty. And so that was another shift for me where it was like, Stop just guessing, like, look at your account, see what you spent in the past kind of average out what you think it might be or like. I know I have to buy a ring soon for my fiance, say OK instead of me Googling What do Ring’s costs? Let’s go to the jewelry store and find an actual number. And then I know I have X amount of time to prepare for that. So it’s yeah, being specific, being intentional. It just all matters so much. So –
Keina Newell [00:46:43] Those pennies count.
Tavianna [00:46:44] Those pennies, those pennies I’ve been spending over.
Keina Newell [00:46:48] They make dollars. OK? They do. Well, is there anything else that you add to our conversation?
Tavianna [00:46:55] I would just add there, maybe in a way that I think about it is like there are certain things that I pay for. Some of them are for convenience. Some of them are because I just don’t have the skill. So I think about how I paid for my nails. I remember one of our early conversations. I was like, Please don’t tell me I have to stop getting my manicures and so that I could do those myself, but it would look terrible. So I paid for someone who is an expert to do that, and I’m thankful for this. I feel very similarly about this relationship. I was struggling and I was truly at the point. I call it like a silent sufferer. I was just struggling on my own, trying to figure it out. Looking at YouTube videos and listening to things that folks suggested. And it wasn’t until I made this leap to work with you that I realized, OK, you were not the expert here. You had an idea of what you were doing, but you didn’t have all the skills, and that’s why it was so challenging. You go to the people that, you know, have the skills and the abilities, and that’s you. When it comes to the finance stuff, you got it. You know it, you understand it, and you also explain it in a way that’s so user friendly and like, it doesn’t make me feel bad about myself, and so I’m just eternally grateful. I know we still have many, many moons ago, but I’m just thankful for this partnership, and I’m glad I took the leap and said, Girl, Tavianna, you’re not the expert. Call someone who is someone who knows what they’re doing because sometimes you just need that. So don’t do your own nails out there, ladies and people. But that’s just my thought.
Keina Newell [00:48:29] Well, thank you so much. I know that that’s valuable for people, and I love hearing people’s feedback on the conversations that we’re having on money files. And I love knowing that people like, Oh, that person, just like me, I love it on the internet. Wherever it is, people message me and tell me about just the. Conversations and how impactful they are because money is so taboo, I know people feel like I’m all alone out here struggling and you’re not. I talk to people every day who are moving, trying to move forward with their finances, and so I’m glad that I can create a space to give you the opportunity to do that. So if you want to move forward with your finances, I would invite you to apply to work with me in my five month coaching partnership. Maybe I told you that I’m not on the internet somewhere as a scam artist. So go to www.WealthOverNow.com/Appointment and I would love to start working with you.
Keina Newell [00:49:25] Thank you so much for listening to Money Files. If you’re ready to take the next step to reach your financial goals, head to www.WealthOverNow.com/Appointment and let’s get started.