Ever felt like budgeting has to be perfect to work?
In this episode, I tackle the common struggle of perfectionism that paralyzes many when it comes to budgeting and I introduce you to the Permission Budget. A simple, powerful tool that helps high earners make intentional money decisions when life feels messy, busy, or overwhelming.
Instead of waiting for the right time to get your finances in order (like after the trip or after the promotion), I walk you through how to build clarity and confidence right now. You’ll learn how to plan ahead, avoid shame, and trust yourself with money even when you’re tempted to swipe first and figure it out later.
Check out this episode where I break down the permission budget and…
- [04:48] The most common emotional triggers behind budget overwhelm
- [06:27] Why high achievers freeze when it’s time to budget
- [09:02] How to create a permission budget in five minutes
- [18:40] What to do right now to take control of your spending
Tune into this episode of Money Files to discover how to take control of your finances without the pressure of perfection.
Are you ready to start asking for help with your finances? Apply to work with me, and let’s start working towards your financial goals.
If you loved learning how to use a Permission Budget to make intentional money decisions, be sure to check out this episode, How to Budget for Clarity & Confidence!
Transcript for “Permission Budgeting: How to Overcome Overwhelm and Take Control of Your Finances”
Intro: Hi and welcome to Money Files. I’m Keina Newell from Wealth Over Now. I work everyday with professional women and solopreneurs to help them get out of financial overwhelm and shame so they can experience more flexibility and ease with their finances. Are you ready to gain confidence and learn to manage your finances intentionally? Tune in and grab financial tips that will help you master the way you think about and manage your finances.
Keina: Hello and welcome back to another episode of Money Files. My name is Keina and I am the financial coach behind Wealth Over Now. If you’ve been listening to my podcast episode and you have found it insightful, you feel like I am all up in your business, I’m on Alexa, listening to the conversations that you were having with yourself, I would appreciate it if you would leave me a podcast review. I love reading your podcast reviews, but also it helps other people be able to find me that are experiencing similar money challenges as you. Because my goal is for everyone to be able to spend money drama free and to really release themselves from the shame that they feel with their finances. So if you do that today, thank you so much. If you would share a podcast episode with a friend, that would also be appreciated.
So today we’re going to go ahead and dive in and I want to talk to you about something that might surprise you because I was just thinking, I was thinking about you and the things that keep you from actually going all in on like changing your relationship with money or really embracing this idea of budgeting. And when I’m on consults week after week, a lot of people tell me how overwhelmed they are. And they’re like, Keina, I know like what I should be doing with money. There’s a lot of should-ing. And just when you have like this perfectionist type of mindset when it comes to your finances, it causes you to feel overwhelmed, it causes you to freeze and you just don’t know where to start. And so basically you just end up stalling and you don’t ever get started. And so if you never get started, we can’t see anything change, right?
And today I want to talk to you about something that I do with my clients and I want to give you the permission to do it with yourself because I want you to get out of that hamster wheel. Ideally, you should work with me in my five month coaching partnership to get out of that hamster wheel. But if you aren’t at that place where you’re like feeling really confident, and I shouldn’t even say confident, but you haven’t actually completed the whole application to work with me, the thing that I want you to actually use is what I call a permission budget. So a permission budget is best used when you feel overwhelmed. If you feel behind, maybe you have a lot of events coming up and you are doing what I call mentally stuttering where you’re telling yourself like, oh, I’ll like figure this out with my next check, oh, I think that I have a bonus coming in. Oh, I have a refund.
But you’re doing this like mental math and if I were to ask you, Hey, where’s the money coming from for you, like, to pay for this trip or whatever, you would just start stuttering. You wouldn’t even know what to say to me because you don’t actually know. And so if you’re in that place, this episode is for you because I want you to use what I call a permission budget. So with my clients, when they first start with me, they’re starting in the middle of their life, right? Like we are meeting and we are looking at the things that are happening for them right now. They could have dinners coming up, they could have birthday parties coming up, they have summer plans, they could have fall plans. There’s just a lot of things, like my clients, I encourage people not to come with me once they have everything cleaned up because if you knew how to clean it up, it would’ve already been solved, right?
So just come as you are and come while it’s messy. And so when they’re coming, while it’s messy, they generally are thinking like, Keina, I have no idea where to start. Or like how I can actually make any progress, when you feel like I have so many balls in the air and there’s so many things going on. And if they weren’t working with me, they might be swiping their credit card just to figure it out. They might be hoping for the that bonus to come in and their bonus is going to help save them or like, they might be expecting a refund that they’re going to get because they haven’t done all of their reimbursement receipts from their job. There are just a lot of wishful places that they’re hoping the money will come from, but the money may come, but because they actually don’t have a plan, it just wipes everything out.
And so they never actually feel like they’re getting ahead. And so what I do, is I help calm that down. I want to calm that sensation that you have in your body down. And I actually want to give you a small win because I know the reason that you’re avoiding budgeting, especially as a high achiever, is that you want things to be right. You want things to be perfect. And so you think you can’t budget if you’re not doing all of the right things. So if you’re not doing all of the right things, or if you mess a number up, then you might as well quit, right? Or you should just figure out how to budget after you’ve actually taken the trip because things will be calmer then or you should figure out how to budget once you get an a full-time job again, because then things will be calmer but that’s not actually true.
What you actually need to use is what I call a permission budget. And so a permission budget is super simple. It doesn’t need to be for a budget for the whole month. It doesn’t even need to be for your whole paycheck, but it’s really just about the next thing coming up. Whatever is like top of mind for you in terms of your expenses. That’s the thing that we need to plan for. So if that’s a weekend trip, we need to plan for the weekend trip. If it is, hey, I have a lot of girlfriends in town, we’re going out this weekend, then we need to plan for you guys to go out this weekend. If you are going to see Beyonce and you’re like, well Keina I got to book a flight and I’m in a hotel and I need a outfit, then that’s the thing that we need to plan for.
And instead of just going into these situations just telling yourself like, Hey, I’m going to figure it out once it’s all over, we are actually going to press pause, take a breath, and we’re going to give ourselves some permission and we’re giving ourselves permission to figure it out. We’re giving ourselves permission to plan. And that ultimately is going to give you permission to spend in a way that’s going to feel intentional for you. So you’re going to ask yourself questions like, what am I going to spend money on? So this is an opportunity for you to be honest about what do I want to spend money on? If you have that weekend trip coming up, you’re like, okay, I know I’m going to get my hair braided, I’m probably going to get a manicure. I know I wanted to get some new shoes. I’m going to shop my closet to see how many dresses I’m going to take.
But like actually walking yourself through the experience of what it would be like to plan for this trip and thinking about what you’re going to pack. What do you need to buy when you go on the trip? What excursions are you going on? Are you eating in the airport? Do we need to pay for parking? But just taking the time to get honest and say, what am I going to spend money on? We’re going to write those things down. You could also ask yourself like, when is money going to leave my pocket? What are some of the unexpected things that the last time I went on a trip that came up and they kind of blindsided me. You can ask yourself that question. You can also ask yourself like, how much do I want to spend? Even if you feel like you don’t have the money in the bank and you know Keina, I’m getting ready to actually be really reckless and I’m going in with a credit card, that’s okay.
I still want you to ask yourself, how much do I want to spend?
Do I want to put $1000 on my credit card? Do I want to put $500 on my credit card? What does that look like? If I am saying I have $300 in the bank and $700 is going on a credit card, like have this conversation with yourself because you’re going to come back from that trip a lot more whole and complete than if you just go into the trip and you just hope for the best. And then most importantly, I want you to ask yourself, how do I want to feel after this experience is over? So it could be the trip, it could be the birthday dinner, it could be the summer concert, whatever it is, you’re asking yourself, how do I want to feel when it’s over? And the goal of a permission budget, it’s not about having all of the perfect numbers and not having to dip into savings or not having to put money on my credit card.
That’s not the goal of the permission budget.
The goal of the permission budget is for you to invite clarity, for you to invite clarity for how you want to spend, for you to invite clarity, that I can actually plan for how I want to spend money, even if I feel like I don’t have all of the money right now. Because when you give yourself permission to plan, even when it’s last minute, even if you use a credit card, you are ultimately taking control. And so I want you to be able to shift from a space of, I am just reaction, reaction, reaction when it comes to my money, to be in a space where you can say like, I’m intentional. I want to say like it gives you an opportunity to role play even in the sense of, I’m going to role play what it feels like to be financially responsible and being financially responsible regardless of if it’s coming out of money in my account or it’s going on a credit card, is me taking the time to ask myself how I want to spend money.
Is me taking the time to ask myself like how I want to feel when I come back because that small win in that process is going to give you a level of trust that’s going to let you know like, oh, I like actually can be good with money. I actually do know how to plan ahead.
And it’s because you took the time to press pause and ask yourself some questions before you started to spend. And I build permission budgets with my clients, I would say within the first two weeks of us working together because there’s something on their schedule that they are getting ready to go and do, that they had planned, prior to working with me. I had a client, she went to Mexico and California, she was gone for maybe three or four weeks. And we literally walked through, she was like, okay, Keina, like I love experiences, I want to be able to dance, I love to eat. We walked through everything and we didn’t even really do it with a spreadsheet we just sat through. We sat there and we talked about, okay, where do you envision yourself eating breakfast? What about lunch? What about dinner? Okay, how much do you think you’ll eat for each one of these?
And so we thought about each part of her trip and what was the goal of each part of her trip? Was it to connect with people? Was it to connect with the community that was there? Was it about experiences? And so we made like a permission budget for each part of her trip. We gave her a goal for how much she was going to be spending per day. So she went into this like three week long trip with a plan and she knew she was going to put the money on her credit card, but we actually had some coaching calls while she was still traveling. And because she went in with this plan, we were looking at the plan to say, okay, like how have you been doing in terms of your budgeting? Are you over or under on your numbers? Like what have you noticed about how you want to spend money? How have you noticed about how you actually have been spending money? And this was a great exercise for us to start our work together because she was able to build awareness about even what she thought she wanted to spend money on versus what she actually spent money on.
Because when we started talking initially, you could hear the like, Keina, I don’t want to be restricted, like I want to be able to have fun and this is the goal of my trip. And so she was able to do all of those things. She had fun, she ate out, she went dancing, she did the things that she wanted and she came back having spent less money than she even thought she was going to spend. Whereas if she hadn’t have done the permission budget before she went and she traveled, she would’ve spent money, she would’ve been less intentional about it. She would’ve been less clear about what she actually likes to spend money on and she would’ve spent more money because she didn’t actually take the time to give herself permission to plan ahead. So the permission budget is really, it’s a place to give yourself a win. It’s a place to ground yourself in the fact that like you can do this, you can be financially responsible, you can budget, and it sets you up to be in a place where like, okay, now I can actually create my entire spending plan and really think about my month and think about the next 90 days.
And because I have that skill, the next time that I have something that comes up, that I want to spend money on, I’m going to be prepared for it. And so your spending and you looking at your numbers doesn’t just have to live in, let me make sure I have all my bills paid. Let me make sure this is happening. Like I want to give you different points of entry in order to be good with money, in order to get started, in order to get out of that overwhelm. And if you’re listening to this and you’re already working with me, or you have worked with me, I was thinking about like how does this permission budget apply to where you are right now? And I want you to remember this is a skill you already have and maybe you’re in a place, because this can happen where you’re like, oh my goodness, Keina, I’ve like fallen off. I haven’t looked at my budget in a few weeks, like I’m behind. But I want to let you know you’re not behind, you are just going to come back to home base.
And your home base is budgeting. You know how to budget, it’s what you already know. And so you can use the permission budget when shame starts to creep in or when you feel like you’ve messed up or you feel like you don’t know where to start. The permission budget is like a quick win. And it’s a quick way to remind yourself that I can trust myself with money, even when things feel messy. So you can ask yourself like, what’s my next best step and what can I do right now? Maybe the outside temperatures have made you overspend a little bit. Okay, I’m going to ask myself, what’s my next best step? Maybe I’m going to look at my weekend and just think about where I want to be more intentional because maybe you’re avoiding your numbers because you’re scared of what they’ll tell you.
And so use that permission budget to get back on track and to think about what you want your spending to look like and to pre-plan what your next steps are because that’s going to interrupt the cycle that you’re in. And it’s really that simple. I think of budgeting as a lifetime body of work, but it really is. It’s a muscle that you grow over time and being able to manage your money well. And there are points in times in which you might be overwhelmed. There are points in times in which you think, oh my goodness, I’m doing, this is amazing, like I have never been this great. And so there’s going to be new challenges that come up and I want you to be able to meet and face those new challenges with curiosity. And I want you to be able to meet yourself there with kindness for what’s going on in your life.
So if you’re listening to this episode and you’re like, okay, Keina, can you give me some next steps? I want you to think about your next few days. Is there a weekend trip that’s coming up? Is there a brunch? Maybe there’s an event that you know is going to cost you money and just take five minutes and ask yourself like, what am I spending on? When is money leaving my account? How much do I want to spend? And that’s your permission budget. That five minutes that you sit there and do that will change everything for you. And if you’re listening to me right now, and this really resonates with you and you want help on actually doing this work consistently, and you want that accountability and support and really being able to work on the mindset part of managing your money and changing your relationship with your finances, this is actually what coaching is for.
So I help my clients make decisions that help them feel clear. They don’t have to be panicked about it. We literally talk through those next steps and then we will build the systems to make sure that they always know what they’re doing with their money. If they feel like there’s something that comes up, they don’t know how to plan for it, I am literally a message away. And then we’re able to actually talk through that so that way they can see like, oh, the rules that I have learned, they fit in this situation too. So if you’re looking for that kind of support, you can head to the link in my show notes to apply to work with me, or you can go to wealthovernow.com/appointment. You can apply to work with me there. But in the meantime, I really do want you to practice giving yourself permission to plan ahead. You don’t have to have a spreadsheet for this. You don’t need to go back and pull out all of your last three months of statements and start highlighting anything. You can just really start to think about what’s the next thing that I could plan for. So thank you so much for tuning in and I look forward to talking to you next week. Bye.
Outro: Thank you so much for listening to Money Files. If you’re ready to take the next step to reach your financial goals, head to www.wealthovernow.com/appointment and let’s get started.
